A ROLLED-UP PIECE OF PAPER

“New York is the only city in the world where you can get run down on the sidewalk by a pedestrian.” - Russell Baker

It was the typical story of visiting New York: it took almost as long to get into the city from La Guardia as it took to fly from RDU to LGA. But what followed was a great day: a Cuban lunch, a taping of The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, and dinner with a friend.

Here is a bit of a rundown on how the Colbert audience thing works. Back on May 1, we had started the mildly complicated process to obtain a pair of free tickets to the Colbert taping. But obtain them we did.  And so, at about 2:30 on the day of the taping, there we were in a line in front of the Ed Sullivan Theater. As it happens, the son of a friend of Beth’s cousin is a director on the Colbert show, and he came out for a few minutes to visit with us and explain what we could expect. He also offered to give us a tour of the theater after the show, an offer we gladly accepted.

A bit before 4:00, we were allowed into the theater lobby, where we stood around and waited for another hour, but at least now in air conditioning. An hour later, we were let into the theater and told where to sit. It’s a surprisingly small theater with a capacity of a bit more than 400. We were on the lower level—there is also a balcony. The bad news is that, through most of the show, I was looking at the back of a large camera rather than at whoever was speaking—Colbert or his guests.  The good news is that, despite this, it was a great time.

It was fascinating to see how it all works.  Even as we were standing in the lobby, staffers came out to coach us on how to cheer during the show. Then, once we were all seated, we were given the run-down again on how and when to cheer and applaud. The when? When the band entered, when Colbert entered, when a guest entered, and whenever one particular producer waved a rolled-up piece of paper in the air. During all this time, loud, upbeat music was played, no doubt trying to keep the audience’s energy level up.

Proceedings began with a warm-up comedian, who also coached us on how to whoop it up. He teased some audience members, calling a few up on the stage, asking them questions, and generally bedeviling them. Then the band entered and entertained the audience.  In watching the show, I’d never heard enough of them to get much of a sense of their music. The live audience hears a good bit of them, however, and they really are a talented group of musicians. After this, Colbert came out to chat with the audience, and did a Q&A, answering such random questions as what is his favorite brand of bourbon. No, I don’t remember his answer. It was a brand I’d never heard of (scotch is my whisky of choice).

He then went backstage, and the cold open video that’s shown in the broadcast was shown to us. Then Colbert made his official entrance, doing, well, what you see on TV. He is engaging in person, and related well to his first guest, Josh Brolin (I later found out they are good friends). His second guest was the young actress who played the female lead in the movie Loving.  Colbert struggled a bit to bring her out, but ultimately got her started on some interesting comments.

The taping breaks when you see a commercial break. Colbert spends this time conferring with his staff, while the audience is again entertained by the band. During one break, Josh Brolin stuck around to record a promo to show on local stations during the evening.

Since the musical act had been recorded earlier in the week, we did not see their performance. After the last interview, Colbert went offstage a bit while the band played, and then came back to do his goodnight run through the audience.

Then we had our tour of the theater. Ballard, the aforementioned son-of-a-friend-of-a-cousin, could not have been more pleasant and informative. He already had planned to give a tour to a half-dozen theater students who were attending the taping and so we joined in, and also enjoyed their company. We got a chance to sit at Colbert’s desk, and to stand on the stage where the Beatles made their U.S. debut. The theater itself was lovely—it was built in the 1920s in a Moorish motif.  The control room was interesting, with an array of gadgetry that I couldn't begin to explain. All the staff that we met were highly professional and very personable. 

There’s just one problem from all of this. I now automatically applaud whenever someone waves a rolled-up piece of paper.